Thursday, May 14, 2015

2 of 5 DeliciScore™ (Not Quite There) Awarded to Sluggers Sports Bar for their Burger dip Sandwich in Seattle, WA on this 14th day of May, 2015 - When you're in a pinch.

Finding Sluggers.  I went out to lunch from work today.  I am working in downtown Seattle these days,  near the stadiums.  I’d been looking online at French dip locations in my work-neighborhood, you know, making my plan, and read that Sluggers—a sports bar down the road from work...I’d been to before—had a French dip…and a burger dip as well.  I decided I’d go there.

On my way out the door, not fully sure I was ready to eat and review a French dip because I didn’t have my good camera on me and my cell phone camera is broken and only allows me to take selfies at this time, which just isn't workable, I walked past the cafeteria / convenience store on the ground floor of my building and noticed—coincidentally-- that they were having a French dip special.  A Thursday thing, I guess.  I’ll save that review for a future time (stay tuned).

I walked down the street looking for Sluggers but couldn’t find it and kept walking, and walking, and walking until I realized that I’d totally missed it and hope was lost.  I finally found what looked to be a suitable alternative establishment, Jimmy’s on First, after passing many a hot dog, kettle korn, and taco stand. 

At Jimmy's, another serendipitous coincidence presented itself: Jimmy’s had a French dip, too.  I was surrounded.  Jimmy's, just North of Safeco Field, was a somewhat swanky but really expensive place.  The prices on the menu were outlandish and nothing sounded good.  I asked the waiter what was good, and in an extremely cliche way responded, "Everything is good."  I was bored, drank my water, waited for a while thinking I'd just get a burger, tried to summon the waiter, couldn't find him, then decided to up and leave.

Jimmy's had a French dip on their menu but the prices were so high it just wasn't worth it.  That place wasn't worth it.  Jimmy's prices were similar to those one would see in a movie theater / ballpark, likely due to their proximity to Safeco Field.  Brief side note: the Mariners—currently 15 wins and 18 losses are on a home stand playing the Boston Red Sox.  Editorial note: the Mariners lost the game that night 2-1.

I was walking back from my long walk, towards work, completely pissed, hungry, and dejected.  I was pissed at the high prices at Jimmy’s and thinking that maybe I’d have to settle for that French dip in the deli in our building, which I really didn't want.  But.  Then.  I spotted Sluggers!  The tables had turned, a strike of good luck, I thought!  I realized why I hadn’t seen Sluggers on the walk down: it’s a very narrow place, I’d guess maybe 12 feet wide, and nested right next to the Elysian Fields restaurant which is quite large.  So I ran across the street and entered.

Inside Sluggers it was pretty empty and quiet in there: there was just a single seated table of other dudes eating lunch and I sat at the bar and handed an ice water by the barkeep. 

The menu and ordering.  It didn't take long to look at the menu and spot my muse, the Burger dip.  At just $8.25, served with tots, fries, or salad (I got tots) and topped with mushrooms and onions, it was a screaming deal compared to what I'd seen at Jimmy's.  I ordered it immediately without much thought.  The bartender gave me the option of adding cheese to the sandwich but--following my rule of no alterations to the chef’s intention as documented on the menu--I did not alter said  sandwich unit.

Arrival and initial taste.  The Burger dip came out pretty rapidly and looked okay.  It had blue-tassled toothpick skewers.  I tasted the sandwich by itself (no jus) for starters to get a notion of its quality.  It was a 2 of 5 (at best): it had a bit of a burnt-meat taste, it wasn’t too juicy, the meat was only okay and was kind of dry.  It was bland.  The onions and mushrooms didn’t add much to the overall experience either.  The sandwich was very flat in overall quality, the meat probably over-cooked. 

The plunge.  I dipped the Burger dip into the jus to see what was going on there and for the hopes the jus could save the dull concoction.  Upon taste, I struggled with the score: was it at 2?  A 3?  A 2.5?  I knew it wasn’t that good.  3 is the best that it possibly could have realistically been.  I’d say it’s a 2.5 to be right in the middle.  It just passes as a reasonable, somewhat acceptable but not all that good burger dip.  It was only okay.

I do not like being overly critical about things (or maybe I love to?) and love food a lot (or maybe I just like it?  No, I really love it) but this was just an okay sandwich.  It gets a barely passing—just barely—grade.  I could be mean, cruel, evil, etc. and score the meal as a 2 but I don't think I'll do that.  I’ll say it’s 2.4 to be nice and let that round down to a 2.  That way, I can blame it on math, logic, and the system and I, personally, don't have to take the fall.  

Other. The tots were fine and as you’d expect, crispy and good: 3 of 5.  I dipped them into French’s yellow mustard only.  I’d typically use a 50/50 ketchup/mustard system but didn't roll that way today.

Summary.  What’s against this burger dip is that it was somewhat burnt, had dry, overdone meat, and the toppings were not value-added.  The jus was only okay, definitely not remarkable at a 2 of 5.  I wouldn’t recommend this burger dip to anyone but odds are if you were totally hammered it would taste fine.  This is not a standout sandwich in any way.  I would refer you to the Kidd Valley or Pump House burger dips instead.  They are way better and more buttery.  And in the case of Kidd Valley burger dip, more garlicky.