Saturday, November 4, 2017

Pizza Pi - Seattle, WA - Field Roast Dip

We're expecting snow.  Oh joy.  Nov 4th.  Hopefully a good ski year here.

Went to a place called Pizza Pi because it was on my list and it was intriguing to me that a pizza place had a French dip.  I would soon be very disappointed.

I always wanted to write "gangster" but never really learned.  How do the gangsters train themselves to write in such cool, embellished fonts when they are probably otherwise of limited talent?

So I go into this place and the lady asks if I need a menu and to sit anywhere.  It's pretty empty in there and poorly decorated.


Sure enough, there's a sandwiches page in the menu and they have a French dip.  But it's a field roast French dip.  I had previously had an excellent vegetarian French dip from Georgetown Liquor Company so was generally hopeful that this place would do something nice, given they were not playing with a full deck.  (Nope) 

The order counter.  Uninspiring.

Two young workers on a Saturday.  7 people may have showed up to the place while I waited and ate.

Here's my table, all marked up.  Just kind of ugly.  I had a lot of "vegan thoughts" while there as I listened to the hipster indy music and wondered and hoped if they'd be able to make a good French dip.  They had a hot oven, I was hopeful.

Savory Field Roast slices, grilled onions and cheese (they don't say what kind but it was some flavorless mozarella like substance, I would come to find) on an oven toasted hoagy roll - Served with our house made au jus.  Seems like they had thought it through to a degree and one review on Foursquare had recommended it.  That's why I was there.  And I was in the neighborhood because I was returning our friend's cat to her, which my wife and I had been watching.

When I ordered, the fellow suggested the Caesar salad.  It was the star of the meal but still lackluster.  I do give it a 4 of 5 in overall quality and tastiness, so that's quite good.  It was a very simple salad in too small of a bowl with the dressing on the side and perhaps too many very herby and very crunchy croutons.

Zoomed in on that there salad.  

So when the French dip came out, I was basically like "WTF?"  why is it all white?  Where the meat.  And the jus, also WTF.  That's a bunch of floating garlic.  I was by no means impressed and here I am two hours later writing up the review and still smell the garlic on me and I'm not impressed.  Very angry in fact!  This sandwich was coyote ugly bad.  I wanted to eat my own arm off to get out of the situation but instead I ate the whole sandwich.  But it was a punishment like that I hadn't experienced in some time.

Let's see: a French dip sandwich that physically looks like it's oozing coleslaw.  In fact it was flavorless and under-melted (probably vegan) cheese.  The vegans might not know food.  I was also affeared that there would be no use of butter and those fears were fully confirmed.  My rage is growing.

Seriously.  Why does it look like this?

I feel ashamed to hold it in my hand.

I feel like I am eating a Seafood Delight sandwich from Subway.  But it doesn't taste good.

I chew some and believe that the sandwich is under-flavored.

The sandwich dipped into the jus in incrementally better but I am still not impressed.  That is was not greasy is perhaps its only saving grace but other than that this sandwich had about zero redeeming qualities.

Just sorrow.

Here's the second half.  I dreaded eating it.  I wanted to leave.  I was so sad, so disillusioned, so alone.

But I plowed on because I am a man.  But god it wasn't good.  It was extremely oniony and garlicky tasting.  And that cheese just looks so horrible and out of place.  Unpleasing.


This is the failed jus at the end.  I didn't want it.

Just not good.  A pile of mess.


Raw Tasting Notes:

Weird place
Vegan
Salad came first
Small salad bowl
Simple Caesar
Good
Cold lettuce 4 in quality and flavor
In Seattle to drop off Tak at brie's
Good, herby croutons
Very crunchy croutons
Nice to start with a salad
Music playing
Definitely hippie
Stark interior
Too many croutons?
Will there be butter?
What kind of cheese (not disclosed)?
Slow water dispenser
Fine in a pizza oven
Hopeful
Weird color
Flavor of sandwich 3
Jus flavor 3, hot, garlic flavor
Cheese not melted, looks like Coleslaw
Predominant onion and garlic taste
Traditional hoagie probably not buttered
Size average
Didn't even want to eat 2nd half
Flavor 2
Jus improves and moistens
2 overall, maybe even 1. Not being greasy saved it.
Too Garlicky
Bland flavor
Commentating

Summary

Bread 2 - It was fine and of okay size but because vegan, not buttered and just plain.
Meat 0 - The Field Roast was salty and probably not enough of it.  Very forgettable.
Non-Meat Toppings 0 - The onions were fine but too predominant.  The cheese was an awful and ugly failure.
Au Jus 0 - Visible garlic floating.  Causes indigestion.  Flavor maybe 2 but overall on the jus, a zero.
Overall 0 - Terrible sandwich.  Never go back.